oxfordtweed: (Bacchus - Read a Book)
Richard Book is Innocent ([personal profile] oxfordtweed) wrote in [community profile] tweedandtinsel2010-12-04 04:38 pm

Come Back to London

Title: Come Back to London
Fandom: Hot Fuzz
Character/s: Nicholas, Travis (Deskjob), Danny, Andrew, Doris
Word Count (chapter/total): 3,400
Rating: NC-17
Summary/Warnings:For the kink meme on [livejournal.com profile] sandfordpolice. Nicholas and Travis' relationship isn't exactly regulation. Rather than doing a bunch of small fics with one prompt each, I decided to do one fic with a bunch of prompts at once.

Prompts used (7 ½):

* Masturbation kink: Nicholas wanking off in a semi-public place thinking about Danny (or fantasizing a threesome with him and Danny and someone else, if you want).
* Deskjob and (a very vocal) Nicholas going at it on Nicholas' desk, with the other officers right outside... if there's biting and body oil I'll love you forever!!
* Angel on top. There's not enough of it.
* Car sex. Where the hell is the car sex? It's so nice and close. Mmm.
* Give clothes a good ripping.
* Where's the awkward sex? Everything goes way too smoothly.
* I suspect, secretly, Angel is an adrenalin junkie. Danger is a powerful aphrodisiac even when it's only pretend.
* ...Angel has trouble keeping quiet because, as we all know, Angel is a screamer.



To Danny's credit, he didn't fall quite so far behind, any more. In fact, one might have gone as far as to have said that he almost kept up, this time. They didn't get to run through people's gardens, though. This bloke had the (in)decency to stick mostly to the high street, although, a few turns through narrow alleys made the chase a bit more exciting, at least.

Luckily for nearly everyone involved, except for one man who would later be identified as "Cousin Tom's aunt's sister-in-law's uncle's stepson, David," Danny had been chased by a stray dog as a youth, and knew the best route through one particularly narrow alley way, and where it ended up. So, rather than wasting his breath in a pointless effort to keep pace with Nicholas and the heathen they were chasing, he casually made his way round to behind the church and waited rather patiently for the suspect to barrel blindly from the alley, and straight into Danny, knocking both of them to the ground. Also to Danny's credit, he was prepared with his cuffs at the ready, and had the suspect restrained and was reading his rights when Nicholas found his way out of the alley, hardly breathing heavily at all.

Nicholas drove the three of them to the station, and letting Danny take credit for the arrest (he did, after all, manage to apprehend the suspect all on his own), decided to go set up a speed trap on a barely travelled road on the outskirts of town. Now that the late George Merchant's bypass was built and operational, barely anyone used the outlying roads. Except for the occasional farmer, but they were hardly going to break the speed limit on a tractor, now were they?

Nicholas parked the Impreza in their usual speed trap spot, marked clearly by a police car-shaped depression in the vegetation that lined the road. He stared at the blank speed radar perched on his knee, willing his hard-on to kindly go the hell away. It was a skill he still hadn't yet mastered, however, with mental power alone. He tried focusing on other things. He'd caught the tail end of a film on BBC 4 a few nights past, but never caught its name. Danny would know the name. Of course, that only brought his thoughts back to where he'd started, so clearly, thinking about other things was not working. Instead, he just started wondering how Danny was getting on at the station, and how he'd managed to make the arrest on his own, mostly, which led to wondering if there were plans for the pub, or a few DVDs that night. Not that he was surprised about this thought path, however; thinking about other things had never worked before.

He could tell himself that he didn't realize what his hand was up to -- make himself believe that it acted upon its own accord, even. But the simple truth was that Nicholas very deliberately and quite knowingly reached to unbuckle his work belt, and then his smaller, more conservative leather belt beneath, until eventually, deft fingers began working at a very stubborn zip, having to almost force brass teeth apart one by one. Biting his lip, Nicholas slipped his fingers beneath the elastic band of his shorts, barely brushing against the tip of his cock; rough fingertips brushing against sensitive skin. He shifted into his own strokes slightly, abandoning the speed radar on the instrument panel as he wrenched his seat back with all the grace of a brick falling from the top of a building. He began long, light strokes with just the pads of his fingers, barely touching himself at all; an action which had no other point besides gentle teasing. The problem with teasing himself, however, was that his hand was every bit as impatient as the parts it was teasing, and his brain on holiday, and therefore unable to referee any action at all. Soon, teasing strokes became a more firm grasp around the shaft, as his thumb worked slow circles around the tip of his cock. He began to quicken his pace, smearing the first traces of precum across his skin. Abandoning the circles across the tip, Nicholas' fingers began to trail further down the shaft of his cock, strokes becoming more hurried and a little more forceful.

At this point, he would normally move further down, fondling his bollocks, and the area of skin that separated them from his anus. At this point, there was not normally a harsh rapping on the window, but that was exactly what happened on this particular day, causing Nicholas to jump with a startled bark. He scrambled to zip, button, buckle, and pull the seat up right at once, and failed at every action as the door swung open.

The man standing outside clicked his tongue. "Hardly acceptable, moral behaviour for the Chief Inspector of the village, now is it?" he said smoothly, leaning into the Impreza to smile smugly at Nicholas. "You're lucky this isn't a very busy road."

Nicholas scowled at the man as he finally managed to put the seat back in its upright position.

"Or is that what you were counting on?"

"Nobody asked you to be here, Travis," Nicholas informed him as he wrestled with his stubborn zip. The teeth seemed to be stuck again. "Why are you following me around, now?"

Travis leant over Nicholas slightly, shrugging innocently. "I had something important to say," he informed him, reaching down toward Nicholas' trousers. "Here," he said with a sinister smile. "Let me help."

Nicholas backed off as much as limited space would allow; which is to say, hardly at all. "So say it, then," he said through clenched teeth, wrestling Travis' hands away from his zip.

"I forgot what it was. This seems more important, anyway."

His hands won the wrestling match, although he suspected Nicholas wasn't trying as hard as he let on. It seemed his idea of "helping" was not what Nicholas thought he needed help with, and instead, he unzipped Nicholas' trousers all the way before sliding himself onto Nicholas' lap, both facing one another.

"Nice head room," Travis mused to himself.

"We can't do this here!" Nicholas protested as Travis swung the door shut. "Road! Right there!"

"You didn't seem too bothered by it a few minutes ago," Travis pointed out smartly as he pressed himself against Nicholas in a highly suggestive manner. Of course, Nicholas had no way of knowing that the steering wheel was otherwise digging rather painfully into Travis' back.

Before Nicholas could protest further, Travis launched an all-out assault on Nicholas, invading the officer's mouth with his own. Nicholas put up a small protest, if only just for show, pushing Travis away from him, although, between the steering wheel, and Travis holding firmly to Nicholas' starched collar, there weren't many places for the officer to go. Eventually Nicholas began to respond, however reluctant he may have pretended to be, and pushed his weight against Travis, hands moving quickly to un-tuck fabric from beneath a loose-fitting waistband.

"We shouldn't be doing this," Nicholas warned as he quickly worked on Travis' belt buckle.

"Says who?"

"We could be sacked," was Nicholas' response.

"Says who?"

Shaking his head, Nicholas tried to push his seat back, angry with it for not going back any further. With his hands firmly on Travis' thighs, he tried to push the other officer back just a bit, angry with the steering wheel for being in the way. Throwing up his hands in defeat, Nicholas shook his head again and tried to manoeuvre himself over to the passenger seat, first finding difficulty in getting out from underneath Travis, then finding difficulty with the handbrake getting caught between his two belts. He tried to dislodge the handbrake from between the stubborn leather before finally giving up and resigning himself to un-fastening the four straps that fastened both belts together. Chucking his work belt onto the floor, he pushed the seat back as far as it would push and motioned for Travis to resume his spot on Nicholas' lap. He made it over to the passenger seat only slightly less awkwardly, hampered only when his torch got caught on the steering wheel. Taking his own work belt off, he flung it over onto the driver's seat as he settled himself back to his previous position, slightly more comfortable than before, and with slightly more room. With enough distance between them to properly move, Travis reached down between Nicholas' legs and grabbed firmly to his cock, doing his own version of teasing.

"We haven't got much time," Nicholas said, inhaling sharply at Travis' touch.

Travis frowned.

"Someone could come down that road any minute."

Travis sighed as his hands quickly moved to the zip on his own trousers. "Fine," he spat out. "You never were much fun."

Letting out a theatrical sigh, and perhaps overdoing it just a touch, he shifted and twisted himself about until his trousers were off at a suitable amount before helping Nicholas pull his own trousers down and out of the way.

"Do you have the stuff?" Nicholas asked.

Travis shook his head. "No."

Nicholas frowned slightly. He wanted to point out how Travis was the one that started this whole mess, but he realized that it would quickly be turned around against him, so he instead opted to keep his mouth shut. Just for a few moments longer, anyway. After a few moments of chewing on his tongue, Nicholas spat into his hand, frowning even more, and used his own saliva as a pathetic attempt to add a little bit of slick to his cock.

"This is going to hurt," he warned simply.

Travis only shrugged as he planted his hands on Nicholas' shoulders, once more straddling the other officer. Nicholas stroked himself lightly a few times before Travis once more took over, guiding himself down onto Nicholas' cock. He gritted his teeth rather painfully, although if he was hoping to divert pain from anywhere else, it most certainly was not working. Squeezing his thighs tightly against Nicholas' hips, he slowly guided himself down, his fingers gripping tightly to Nicholas' shoulders. Nicholas arched his back and ran his fingers through the fine hair on Travis' thighs, scratching his nails lightly into bare skin. Travis bucked his hips suddenly, causing Nicholas to jerk quickly, banging his knee on the glove compartment. He barked out loudly at the sudden pain in his knee, but was stifled from anything further by Travis' mouth connecting with his own. Or, more specifically, Travis' tongue invading his mouth. He responded eagerly, bucking his hips not quite in time with Travis' grinding motions, as his hands struggled to find something -- anything -- to grab hold of for better leverage. His hands finally settling on Travis' hips, Nicholas broke away from the kiss suddenly, whining lightly through bared teeth. His back arched fiercely as he climaxed, not quite panting, but still breathing heavily.

"You're kidding?" Travis demanded, looking at Nicholas with something akin to disgust.

"I..."

Travis sighed. "Always did have to be first at everything, didn't you?"

"Hey, now," Nicholas said defensively. "That's hardly fair!"

"You're telling me," Travis muttered as he swung the door open carefully.

"I had a head start!"

Travis climbed awkwardly from the car and fixed his trousers, hidden behind the open door. "Take me back to the station," he demanded flatly. "Or will you just cock that up, too?"

Nicholas sneered at the other officer before dejectedly fixing up his own trousers, having to fish around the floor for both of their work belts. Getting everything back into position was no easy task, but he eventually managed to climb back over to the driver's seat, giving Travis room to get into the passenger seat. Nicholas silently handed Travis' belt over to him, waiting for the officer to fasten it and get his seat belt on before starting the Impreza's impressive engine, and heading back to the station.


Neither said a word the entire way in. Nicholas drove, focused intently on the road ahead, and Travis just sulked in the passenger seat. They parked outside of the station, Nicholas stiffly making his way back to his office, and Travis not far behind. Andrew, not in his shared office with Andy (if only just to fetch them both more cake), took a small step back as Nicholas passed, having already learned to avoid making snide remarks about the chief when he was in a foul mood and still within ear shot.

"Lovers' quarrel?" he ventured cautiously, once Travis slammed the office door shut.

Doris laughed and helped herself to a bit of Andrew's cake.

Inside his office, Nicholas tightly crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against his desk, not quite able to meet Travis' eyes. Travis occupied himself by walking round the office, looking at all the random trinkets and books that had accumulated over the months.

"Might as well make this official," he said absently.

"No," Nicholas replied simply.

Travis' focus didn't waver from the plaque he'd been reading over. "'No,' you don't want to make this official, or 'no,' you're still not coming back to London?" he asked.

"I kinda like it here," was all Nicholas responded, looking out his window, which faced the church off in the distance.

Travis sighed, turning to face Nicholas. "Stop sulking and look at me," he said firmly -- but not firmly enough to make it an order.

Nicholas obliged, turning to face Travis, and finding himself once more surprised to have someone else's tongue in his mouth. Travis held firmly to the sides of Nicholas' face for a moment, before moving down to his neck and shoulders, gripping fiercely. For a moment, Nicholas put up a show of trying to fight Travis off, but gave up after only a few moments and let himself go along with it, responding to Travis' touch and exploration. He leaned in to Travis as familiar hands trailed down the front of his trousers to un-tuck his shirt. Travis tried to work the buttons on Nicholas' shirt, but soon found them too difficult to negotiate and instead just pulled the shirt open, sending bits of white, circular plastic tickering across the office.

"Hey!" Nicholas protested, backing as far back as his desk would allow him.

Travis only shrugged before reaching down to remove Nicholas' work belt again, tossing it lightly to the chair behind the desk. Soon his hands were down the front of Nicholas' trousers again, stroking playfully as he leaned his weight against the other officer. He broke away just long enough to remove his own work belt, tossing it along with Nicholas', before leaning back against him. He rubbed his cock against Nicholas' thigh, grinding lightly as hands explored and teased.

"He's straight, you know," Travis said as he quickly unbuckled Nicholas' belt.

Nicholas took his mouth away from Travis' neck quickly. "I know," he said simply, before lightly biting bare skin.

"He can't..." Travis started as he wrestled with Nicholas' stuck zip, "...give you what you want."

Nicholas moved up Travis' neck slightly. "I know," he repeated.

"You're thinking about him, aren't you?" he asked as he unzipped his own trousers.

Nicholas bit Travis' neck once more. "So what if I am?" he asked lightly before kissing the spot behind Travis' ear.

"Come back to London," Travis begged finally, squeezing Nicholas' cock.

Nicholas hissed sharply. "No."

"Turn round." In one swift motion, he pulled down Nicholas' trousers and spun him around, bending him over the desk. His hand pressed firmly against Nicholas' back, he leaned over the desk and opened the top drawer, finding a small bottle of hand lotion. "You're so predictable," he said as he opened the lid. Letting his own trousers drop to the floor, Travis stroked himself a few times, applying a generous sample of the hand lotion to his cock. "This might sting a bit," he warned.

He slowly entered Nicholas, having to stand on his toes to get the right angle. Nicholas closed his eyes tightly and grabbed hold of the edge of the desk, biting down onto the fabric of his shirt sleeve as he let out a small whine. "Gently," he said through clenched teeth.

"As you wish."

Travis pressed his hands into the small of Nicholas' back, pressing himself in to the hilt, pausing only to shudder slightly. Moving his hands down to Nicholas' hips, he began to rock against the other officer, slowly pulling nearly all the way out before burying himself once more. Nicholas cried out sharply, his face red, and knuckles white against the edge of the desk. Once more, he buried his face into his arm, biting down in an effort to keep quiet as Travis built up a quickened rhythm. Travis squeezed bare skin tightly as he began slamming his hips against Nicholas' arse. Nicholas leaned his head back, trying to stifle a loud cry, and succeeded instead in letting out a high-pitched whine.

"Do you want them to hear?" Travis panted as he reached around to the front of Nicholas' neck, wrenching his tie over his head, and sending the one remaining button on his shirt flying across the desk. Doing his best to keep pace, Travis balled up Nicholas' tie and stuffed it in his mouth. "Keep quiet," he warned.

Nicholas whined -- much more quietly this time -- and let his head drop against the desk. As he slammed himself against Nicholas, Travis reached down between Nicholas' legs, knowing he liked to be touched and rubbed just behind his bollocks. Nicholas arched his back into Travis and bit down hard on the silk in his mouth, letting out a muffled cry into the fabric. After a few moments, Travis' hand moved to stroke Nicholas' length as his other trailed down his thigh, then back up again, digging his nails deeply into bare skin. He relished in the odd, unusually high-pitched noises Nicholas seemed capable of making only during sex, and did everything in his power to keep Nicholas making those noises. He'd scratch, stroke, tease, fondle, bite, and claw to keep those noises going. Panting heavily, Travis buried himself deep as his left hand quickly stroked Nicholas' cock, feeling sticky fluid flow over his fingers. Leaning down, pressing his chest against Nicholas' arched back, Travis bit down on the exposed skin of Nicholas' neck, knowing exactly how much pressure to apply to get the other officer to cry out into the fabric in his mouth, but not leave a mark.

Losing his rhythm, Travis began bucking wildly, his hand reaching for hair to pull, but finding only short, blond fuzz on the back of Nicholas' head. Through clenched teeth, he let out a light whine of his own as he released his own fluid. He collapsed onto Nicholas' back, reaching to pull the tie from the other officer's mouth as they lay exhausted, panting heavily, hot breath fogging the polished surface of the desk.

"You're absolutely positive?" Travis asked after a few moments of catching his breath.

Nicholas didn't answer. Instead, he pushed Travis off his back and got to his feet, bending to pull up his trousers. He shook off his tie -- which was certainly ruined -- and moved to put it back on, sighing heavily upon noticing that every button on his shirt had been forcibly removed. He shook his head and put the tie on anyway as Travis shuffled to get dressed as well, pulling his trousers on and situating his belt. Nicholas settled his shirt as well as he could before reaching for his jumper, pulling it over his head as his office door swung open.

"Oh, sorry!" Danny said quickly as he shut the door. A few moments later, he knocked twice on the door frame before opening it again. "I know, I know. Knock first," he said as he stepped into the office. "Hi, Travis," he said with a smile. "Oi, Nicholas. That new Jason Statham movie's playin' in Buford Abbey tonight. You want me to get you a ticket?"

Nicholas smiled as he reached for his work belt. "Sounds good," he said honestly. "Do I have time to run home after shift?"

Danny clapped his hands lightly. "Yeah!" he said, excited. "Pick you up at seven!"

Still grinning, Danny practically bounced out of the office, shutting the door behind him.

"I've already told you," Nicholas said to Travis as he put his work belt back on. "I kinda like it here."


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